Maybe I Don’t Want To Be A Novelist8/13/2022 Lately, I’ve been writing short stories. To be fair, I’ve been writing them for as long as I have use of memory, but I began taking this format seriously about a year and a half ago. My journey was, in the beginning, rough. I wrote stories about the characters of my ongoing WIP at the time and tried to venture in the genres I was already familiar with. I’ve always written for myself, but then I was starting to understand my writing. I lost a couple of competitions, I worked with writing buddies. I discovered my strong points and worked through the weak ones. I revise and ask for feedback, I learn, I enjoy challenging myself to grow through this format. Flash forward and I’m almost done with my first short story collection, and I’ve written a handful of pieces for Lit Mags. So, why do I feel like it’s not enough? I believe that it is, in part, because I have always wanted to write a book. But I have settled with the idea that a book is a 50k, multiple chapters, novel. And this is what the writing community tends to think about too when asking about your WIP, even if it’s just in the collective subconscious. So my stories are supposed to have a place only on Instagram posts and Lit Mags, which are all great mediums. But they don’t meet my ambitious, seeing my book at the bookstore, dreams. Sometimes it feels like they fall… short. See, I’ve never completed the first draft of a novel. There, I said it. I have outlines and plotting boards and a few chapters, and a short story or two. But that’s as far as I have gotten. And part of the reason why I don’t put in time and effort into drafting a novel is because it almost feels like a chore. In my mind, this gets somehow twisted into the idea that I’m not a writer. Screw the thousands of words dedicated to shorter pieces, or the merits I have received for them. Even if I try to remind myself that everyone’s pace is different, imposter syndrome still hits hard. Yes, I’m doing my best to battle it. Maybe that’s why I’m writing this article. I’m trying my best to reshape this mindset. I think about all the short story collections that I have read which have impacted on me. Hans Christen Andersen, Agatha Christie, Marissa Meyer, Julio Cortázar. The truth that I’m beginning to understand is that I am not impatient, and I do have determination and perseverance; even if I think otherwise when I doubt my format. I work hard and I like doing so, because this is the format I feel comfortable with. Even when I like to experiment with poetry and even screenplays, I always go back to prose with less than 5K words. I believe that there is something freeing about short stories. There is no pressure to reach the word count, and it gives me the chance to experiment and focus on a couple of aspects of my writing at the time. I learn something new while writing each story. I still want to write a novel, simply not right now. Not as my main project at least. I want to say that my ongoing WIP is my short story collection. I want to keep writing one shots and finishing a story in a day and writing flash fiction whenever I have five minutes to spare. Not only because it allows me to keep engaging with writing during busy days, but because that’s what I enjoy doing. What have I learned? Never force yourself to write something that you don’t want to. If you write a form that is not a novel, you are not any less of a writer. And finally, writing is a craft that we are meant to mold to our own creativity, to our own lives. Not the other way around. Paula Argudois a young planster with too much passion and too little time on a day. She has been telling stories for as long as she can remember, whether they are thoroughly researched flash fiction pieces or improvised bedtime stories.
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